By Kristina Roth

Kristina Roth is an intern at Missional Wisdom Foundation, studying at Perkins School of Theology, and is a provisional elder in the Iowa Conference of the UMC.

“Let’s go out for dinner tomorrow!” said a friend. With a lot of inward hesitation and so many internal thoughts, I shyly say, “Yes!” Going over and over in my head everything I’ve eaten that day and how many calories I have left, I discreetly look on my phone for nutrition facts. Hands are sweaty as I sit there at the table, unsure of what to order. What has the fewest calories? Worse yet, is when the meal is at their house, and I have no control over what is provided.

Community around the table is a very painful place for me. So often, we meet friends for a dinner out or go to dinner on a first date. Our holidays are filled with decadent desserts and entrees. This community around the table is a very painful place for someone like me, someone who has a past of disordered eating and excessive exercise.

On the night in which Jesus Christ gave himself up for us, he took bread, gave thanks to God, broke the bread, gave it to his disciples, and said: “Take, eat; this is my body which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” When the supper was over, Jesus took the cup, gave thanks to God, gave it to his disciples, and said: “Drink from this, all of you; this is my blood of the new covenant, poured out for you and for many for the forgiveness of sins. Do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me.”

What if I can reclaim community around the table by placing it in and around the sacrament of Holy Communion? Jesus and his disciples partook in the Eucharist around the table at an actual meal, beginning and ending this meal around Holy Communion. The Eucharist, which nourishes and sustains my soul was first centered in and around a meal. Through partaking in the bread and cup, I experience the disabled God, Christ, resurrected with scars and wounds, a beautifully imperfect body. It is through brokenness that we are made whole. Just as the gift of bread and wine nourishes my spiritual soul, food nourishes my natural soul, body, mind, and spirit.

We come home to God during Holy Communion, and likewise, we come home to ourselves, fully loving ourselves all by the grace of God!